August 2013 – What this means

Well, now it is actually August of 2013. For me, this is a very big deal for 2 simple reasons. My son is on Summer break between grades and ‘we’ (feels more like ‘me’ right now but applies to us) have really been here nearly 3 years now.

How and why that affects me, is not the same as it effects him. I might get to really leave, but I will have to endure some forms of loss even if I do, but the thought of returning to an English speaking nation – especially my own country, and being able to get a day job and to socialize without needing to wade through waist deep German language is enough to almost bring tears of relief to my eyes and emotions.

If my son and his father did not have so much a legitimate German nationality, and ethnic ‘thing’ I would not have come here unless someone had given me a Fulbright scholarship to teach philosophy – probably ‘to teach dead German philosophers in English to Germans’. Something like that could have brought me here, others pretty much ‘no’.

This is still effects of an international romance of the 1990s in which foreign graduate students studying in fashionable Greater London tried meeting and hit the jackpot – only instead of having been cash, it was that they became parents. Apparently an American & German mixed together is called an AmiKraut; I’m glad some term was devised to describe what that is. If you don’t go to graduate school in England even though you are not an English citizen this won’t happen to you. Whether or not it is truly advanced or very basic is a matter for interpretation. Same old thing; people in their 20s becoming parents.

Well, this is a long post. I feel like I have been out of the USA and in Germany for an incredibly long time. In some ways it is really nice, in some ways a very bad match for me and I hate how it has been for me – luckily my son likes it well enough…

That is all true, but it seems as if ‘it shouldn’t be or something…Irrational…not sure…It might just be that the post is far longer than I had intended.

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